We traverse a wormhole, which is packed with Heartless ships. Where did the Heartless get their enormous gummi armada?

The next stop turns out to be Aladdin-country, ‘Agrabah’.

Why does every Disney film have to have a small comic relief character with some kind of accent that I think is New York? Going from Phil the Satyr to… whoever this parrot is really highlights the similarity.

Malificent in a market area of Agrabah, saying 'We need all seven princesses of heart to open the final door.'

Malificent reveals something of their Evil Plan. Apparently these are specifically ‘Princesses of Heart’. Jasmine is the relevant one here, and she turns out to be eavesdropping.

Naturally, the Heartless in this area carry curved swords and wear turbans.

Aladdin, it turns out, is being eaten by the Sarlacc. But we soon rescue him and hurry back to rescue Jasmine. We get a condensed version of the Genie plot. Jasmine gets trapped in a centipede made of pots, so, boss fight!

Then, immediately after, another boss fight against the giant sand tiger that has all the treasure in it.

Once I’m in the Cave of Wonders, it’s the standard battery of ‘ancient temple/dungeon’ traps: rolling boulders, things that shoot out the walls, enormous pits, etc. I loot some items, which I’m pretty sure was very much against the rules, but evidently not. The place kinda reminds me of Sen’s Fortress, to put in this post’s gratuitous Dark Souls reference.

I got raelly stuck here and spent ages fighting back and forth through the dungeon to try and find the thing to unlock progress. It turned out what I needed to do was swim up a waterfall. Yeah.

…not even that? that got me a decent item but… still can’t figure out what I need to do?

ugh in the end i looked up a walkthrough. apparently i just have to jump and hit the pillar I found like, an hour ago.

Jafar, at least, is an easy boss, even with his invincible genie backup. The main problem is that sometimes he hovers in places you can’t reach. If Jafar was smart, he’d stay in those spots and be unbeatable.

Like in the film, Jafar uses his final wish to become a genie himself. Unlike the film, this results in a giant lava hole appearing.

Sora standing on the edge of a large hole in the ground with lava visible at the bottom.

Naturally, we jump right in.

For an ‘all-powerful’ genie, Jafar’s rather uncreative with his powers, mostly resorting to throwing lava around while his parrot carries his lamp, which has a lot of health to grind through. (Fortunately, the parrot apparently does not think to fly over the lava where we can’t attack it.)

Jafar dispatched, we return to Jasmine getting kidnapped, presumably by Maleficent’s forces. I’m getting really frustrated at all the femlae characters in this game being damsels in distress (except Maleficent and the Final Fantasy characters, and the latter two don’t fight or anything). And couldn’t we have left Goofy to stand guard or something?

We escape in a short flight sequence. Oddly, the flight model is different from the spaceflight minigame, but it’s easy enough. Given the whole sequence lasted maybe thirty seconds, I kind of wonder why they went to the effort of coding it?

It turns out… Riku is the one who kidnapped Jasmine! The Disney Villain Council is thinning out with Jafar gone. Hades and Maleficent are still around, and I’m sure there were some others… indeed they are, for here comes Captain Hook!

Anyway I found the shop to buy colours, and spend like the next hour making a cool spaceship.

A sleek white and purple spaceship with wings, fins, and a variety of weapons.

That’s more like it!